4 Weeks Old

Well, we survived the first four weeks. Barely.

Marcus on his 4 week old bday.
 He was ticked that I set him down.

Everyone is happy to get their pic taken except Harvey ...

One of the newborn pics I took.

I love our little guy. Really, I do. But the last four weeks have been rough. Thankfully he only had to be on the bilirubin lights for 48 hours and we were over the jaundice. Unfortunately, Marcus also has severe Gastroesophageal Reflux Disease (GERD), which is basically really bad acid reflux.

So, when he was just a few hours old I asked a nurse at the hospital about a gagging sound he was making while I nursed him, worried he had acid reflux. She told me he probably just swallowed some amniotic fluid and that it would go away in a few days. I clung on to that because I didn't want to think that it was a bigger problem than that.

I tried and tried to get sibling pics.
It never really worked out as you can see ...
We have to stick with the more candid shots around here.

Well it never went away. It's only gotten worse. Poor little guy was only sleeping in 30 minute stretches, 24 hours a day, and I was going to lose my mind. I told Mitch I was going to run away. 

(Funny side story: one morning Marcus actually slept fairly decent so I decided to go for a walk outside before everyone woke up. I wrote Mitch a little note telling him I'd be right back and left it on his alarm clock since I figured he'd look there first. Marcus woke up crying soon after I left so Mitch stumbled in there to get him without seeing the note. Of course he wondered where I was and seriously thought that I really had run away. (I'm telling ya, it's been rough around here.) After a few minutes he saw the note and understood. I really worried him, poor hubby! But I am shocked he thought I'd actually run away; I never really would!))

This is what happens when you nurse in front of your observant 3 year old.

But I digress. So, I was in denial and couldn't admit that Marcus had something wrong with him. I was telling my mom how he didn't sleep and made these gagging sounds and several other symptoms and she said that perhaps he had acid reflux. (She would know since I had GERD and my brother had acid reflux.) I brushed it off at first, even though I've known since the day he was born that he had it, I was just hoping that the nurse was right and that it would just magically get better really fast. It didn't and I finally had to admit that something was wrong.

This pic is for our friends, the Burts, who live in MA and gave
Marcus this adorable outfit. Thanks guys!

We've since tried just about everything. I hold him upright for at least 30 minutes after he nurses (which sucks in the middle of the night when all I want to do is go to bed). I wear a baby sling and carry him around for hours every day, which makes him happy and kills my back. We give him a binky because it's supposed to help produce more saliva and reduce stomach acid. I have quit eating dairy, citrus fruits, chocolate, and anything spicy, fatty, tomato based or fried. It sucks, but I've almost lost all my baby weight because I'm always starving! Ha, ha. We tried having him sleep in his car seat, swing, and in the crib with the mattress angled and he hates them all. We finally broke down and bought a $75 Fisher Price Rock 'n Play sleeper and it has changed our lives! He LOVES it and sleeps so much better in it. (It's only been two days, but I'm really hoping it will continue.) At night he sleeps in it right next to our bed. When he starts to fuss I just put my hand on him and he calms right down. It's the sweetest thing. He's a total mamma's boy. I remember when I was young and would get sick and all I wanted was my mom to hold me. I think he feels the same way, poor little guy.

The lifesaver.

Last week I finally broke down and took him to the pediatrician and got him on Zantac. I really hate to medicate my tiny little baby, but he was having such bad reflux spells and even quite breathing a time or two. So scary. I'm not sure if the medication is working. Sometimes I think it is, other times it doesn't seem to do anything. We're in the process of working with our pediatrician to possibly switch him to Prevacid, though I'm hesitant to do that  too. I'm torn between him suffering and giving drugs to my newborn ... also, today his reflux has been so much better, and he's actually taking good naps, so I'm hoping he'll outgrow this sooner rather than later.

Layla thought he might want the cat toy to sleep with.
How thoughtful.

Anyways, when he's not in pain, he's actually the sweetest, most content little guy. Though I must say he has the stinkiest gas! He's such a boy. Mitch says he'll be the hit at scout camp. Ha, ha. That's why boys puzzle me ... why would stinky gas make you popular? Weird. Anyways, Marcus sure loves his sister! He smiles a lot when he can hear her talking. I know they say babies don't really smile until they are two to three months old, but I swear he smiles for her! She loves him too. She gets sad that he can't play with her yet, but pretty soon he'll be following her around and driving her nuts, so she should enjoy this time. Ha, ha. 

I am thankful that GERD is the worst thing wrong with him. It will go away and he'll be totally fine. I am really very thankful that it's nothing more serious. Also, I've learned a lot of patience and how to go with the flow the last few weeks. I never knew I was such a control freak until Marcus was born! Lately I've been going crazy because he's not on any type of schedule: I am constantly nursing him and it's rare that I am ready for the day before noon. And let's not even talk about housework or making dinner. I couldn't handle the unpredictability at first. But I've been learning to let go a little and it's been really good for me. Funny how trials make you grow and learn so much. Also, Mitch is a lifesaver and helps with all the things I can't get to.

Layla is adjusting really well. She's still her particular little self, but she also makes me laugh. Like the other night at dinner when she said her food was "fancy" and we finally figured out she meant spicy. Or the other night at bath time when I finished washing her hair and asked her to stand up and she said she couldn't because she was "taking a break for a minute." When I asked her what she was taking a break from she said from me washing her hair. Apparently it's exhausting.

Dancing and silly face.

Most of all, she is so sweet with her brother. She asks to hold him quite often now and is always laughing at every little movement he makes. It melts my heart to see the two of them together. I love my kiddos. Even on the hard days (or weeks!).